Random Thingys?

OK, once there were three men, named Shut Up, Manners, and Poop. One day, they were riding in a car, and Poop fell out, so Manners when to get him.
While Shut Up was still in his car, a police officer passed by.
"What's your name?" The officer asked.
"Shut Up." Shut Up said.
"No, I mean, what's your name?" the police officer said, growing slightly frustated.
"Shut Up!" Shut Up repeated, slightly louted.
"I MEAN WHAT'S YOUR NAME!" The police officer bellowed.
"SHUT UP!" Shut Up shouted.
The police officer sighed. "Where are your manners?"
"Oh, Manners if over there," Shut Up said, "Picking up Poop."

lol, I think I'm heard of something close to that

Have you heard about the Five Chinesse men?

no

That one is famous!

never heard of it

Are you sure?

yeah.

Wooowww. How about the three babies?

nope

OK, once there were five chinnesse men. They were just learning how to speak english, so they could only say fragments of stuff. One knew how to say, "Yeah, Duh." The second one knew how to say "Forks and knives! Forks and knives!" The third one knew how to say, "HE STOLE MY LOLLIPOP!" the fourth one knew how to say, "Yaaaayyy! Hooray! Let's have a celebration!" and the fifth one knew how to say, "Plug it in! Plug it in!"
So one day they were walking around, and they came across a dead man lying in the middle of the street. Then a police officer came around.
"Did you kill this man?" he asked.
"Yeah, duh." said the first man.
"What did you kill him with?"
"Forks and knives. Forks and knives."
"But why?"
"He stole my lollipop!"
"You're going to jail!"
"Yaaaaaay! Hooray! Let's have a celebration!"
In jail, the five chinnesse men share a room with an american dude.
One day, when the american dude was sleeping, the police man came in. He set a device on a coffe table next to the Chinnesse men and set a contraption with many wires on the table.
"Whatever you do," the police man said, "don't plug the wires in or the world will explode." then the police officer left.
Of course, the Chinnesse men didn't understand any of this. Then the american dude woke up.
"Am I suppossed to plug this in?" He asked the five Chinnesse men.
"Yeah, Duh." said the first one.
"Plug it in! Plug it in!" said the fifth one.
So he plugged it in, and BOOM.
Oh yeah, before the world exploded, the fourth one said, "Yaaaay! Hooray! Let's have a celebration!"

I've heard both those before, lol!

But the second, I heard it where, at the end, the guys were strapped to electric chairs. To be killed, of course. So, when the operator of the death machins was ready to go, he asked them: "Are there any last words you want to say?" And the Chinese goes "Plug it in, plug it in!"



I got anutta one!!!


One day, a group of 4 friends were walking in the park with thier dogs. Three were american and the fourth was recently from china, and didn't know much about his town yet. While walking, the three american diecide to have a contest. In this park, there was a really, really wide river, and a bridge that expanded it. So, they told the chinese guy "There's a bridge coming up, and we want to have a contest. We want to see whos dog can go across the bridge and back without taking a dump." The chinese guy nodded enthusiastically, and they thought he had no idea what they were talking about, and now the joke was on him. So, they get to the bridge, and the first american guy goes. His dog managed to get across the bridge and a little of the way back before pooping. He came back shamefaced as his friends were laughing. The second american goes, and his dog doesn't even make it to the other side. He came back grumbling something about it being sick. The third american goes, and his dog got halfway back before it too pooped. Finally, it was the chinese guy's turn. "He'll never make it.""I bet he doesn't get ten feet" they jested and boasted back and fourth. The chinese guy ignored him, and to their astonishment, the dog makes it acros. "It won't make it back" they muttered amoungst themselves. And, so, it was to their jaw-dropping astonishment when the chinese guy crosses the finish line, his dog never even taking a squat. "How--?" "What the--??" "How did it do that?" They all wondered, wide eyed and jealous. The chinese guy simply grinned, and said "Me Chinese, me no dum. Me stick cork up doggy's bum!"

......... That one was random. But cool!

LOL!! I love these. any more?

edit: I have one!

okay, so there are 3 people. They were stranded on an island 10 miles away from the coastline. the first guy tried to swim, but got tired after 1 mile. he swam back. The second guy tried to swim, but got tired after 3 miles. he swam back. The last guy tried to swim, but got tired after 5 miles, so he swam back.

this one takes alittle thinking. but if you don't get it, just ask.

I got that one at the firest reading

heres one

there was a chinese, american, and canadian person. they were instructed to go in a plane and throw somthing for there country. the american threw out a penny and said " for my country" and jumped out. the canadian threw a million bucks outand said"for my country", and jumped. The chinese threw a bomb out, and said "for my country", and jumped. as the american landed and saw a little girl crying, and asked whats wrong. she said a penny had fell on her head. the canadian landed and saw a really happy guy. he asked what happened, he said he found a million dollars. then, the chinese landed, and found a little boy laughing his pants of. he said "my grandma farted and the city block blew up!"

wierd....
and blue gray told meh that one

yeah, that one is really common.

lol.

I love that one.

Of course.

theze is soo funny!!!!!!!!

I know.... xD They're sweet.